Passion, Desire, Dreams

(Thanks Google for your image)

 "Passion, it lies in all of us, sleeping

waiting and though uwanted, unbidden

it will stir open its jaws and howl.

It speaks to us,

guides us,

rules us all, and we obey.

What other choice do we have? 

Passion is the source of our finest moments.

The joy of love

the clarity of hatred

and the ecstasy of grief.

It hurts sometimes more than we can bear.

If we could live without passion maybe we'd know some kind of peace,

but we would be hollow.

Empty rooms shuttered and dank. 

Without passion

We'd be truly dead"

 -Joss Whedon

I have had kind of a mental block from my last post. So I have this thing inside of me to not be doing what I'm doing right now. Just this "itch" to do be doing something else. So now what? I WANT to do something else. I KNOW this is not the most God has planned for Owen and I. It can't be. A 9 to 5 desk job is not either of our dreams. It might not be missions or maybe it's short term missions. Or maybe it's a different job. So what's next? What do we do with these scattered puzzle pieces that we can't somehow fit together to make a cohesive pattern. There is passion, there is desire for something more, but how do we attain that?

I've been thinking a lot about dreams and desires. It's so cool to me that not everyone has the same passions. While one person might have a passion for missions another person might have a passion for music and things get done in the kingdom of God all across the board, because he placed different desires and calls in us. To go do something that is burning inside of us, for His name. He is pretty dang brilliant, that God. 

And we all reflect parts of His personality. What a privilege to be His hands and feet! We get to play a part in all of this because He has birthed individual desires in all of us. He gets glory and the thirst of our souls get satisfied. Again I say, brilliant. 

But sometimes, our desires and dreams become our own. We cling so tightly to wanting that thing that we lose purpose. He gave us desires not to hoard and dictate on our terms, but to line up with His vision. And then when we don't see them happening the way we want, we get frustrated and angry. We close down, shut off. We want that desire to just go away so we can just rest in where we are now. 

I went to this gal's concert last night. She shared her heart about her dreams of pursuing music and her "selfishness" in her pursuit. She told us that she prayed for the desire to just go away because it hurt too much. 

God didn't give us desires to be silenced and to be shoved in the back of our hearts for safekeeping and hoarding. He gave us desires so that we will move. So that it will drive us to go after the things He is after. 

This is not our permanent home. We are guests on this Earth with purpose. He breathed a mission into all of us. He backed it up with passions and desires and dreams. 

He gave us His heart for this place. He asked us to do His work. Sometimes we find ourselves inadequate to do the job. But He does not fail. He can use anything and anyone He wants, to accomplish the desires of His heart. We get to make the choice of whether we will participate, no matter how hard, how painful, and how beautiful

But whatever we decide,

He will have His way. 

At her concert, Steph sang this song, by Brit Nicole. I want this to be the song of my heart. 

Feels like I`ve been here forever,
Why can`t you just intervene?
Do you see the tears keep falling?
And i`m falling apart at the seams.
But you never said the road would be easy,
But you said that you would never leave.
And you never promised that this life wasn`t hard,
But you promised you`d take care of me.

So I`ll stop searching for the answers,
I`ll stop praying for an escape,
And I`ll trust you,God, with where i am,
And believe that you will have your way.
Just have your way.
Just have your way.

When my friends and my family have left me,
And I feel so ashamed and so cold.
Remind me that you take broken things
And turn them into beautiful.

So I`ll stop searching for the answers,
I`ll stop praying for an escape,
And i`ll trust you, God, with where i am,
And believe that you`ll have your way.
Just have your way.
Just have your way.

Even if my dreams have died,
And even if i don`t survive,
I`ll still worship you with all my life.
My life.
Whoa-oh..

And I`ll stop searching for the answers,
I`ll stop praying for an escape,
And i`ll trust you, God, with where i am,
And believe that you will have your way.
Just have your way.
Just have your way.

I know you will.
I won`t forget.
Whoa-oh
You love me.
Have your way.
Yeah

http://www.lyricsreg.com/lyrics/britt+nicole/Have+Your+Way/